Deborah B Shields

My Mother at Church

When asked whom we admire and look up to, we always forget the ones closest to us; we forget the heroes we live and work with on a daily basis. These people make a true difference in the world. For me, that hero is my mother, Deborah Shields. Always taking her for granted, it is only now that I realize the genuine effect she has had on my life. Through childhood, adolescence, and adulthood, my mother has been my role model and most beneficial hero.

Before I was born, my mother received her bachelor's degree in business administration and held a job at a bank, working in administration; but she gave all of this up to give birth to my sister and me, and raise us full-time at home. From issuing loans and balancing accounts to changing diapers and chasing toddlers, my mother easily transitioned into the position of manager of the household. She voluntarily took the hardest job in the world, a job in which many people fail or abandon. Despite the long hours, my mother was always cheerful, patient, and kind. As I grew older, she gave my sister and me countless rides to sports, church rehearsals, and school functions. On top of taking care of us, my mother also volunteered her time tutoring and mentoring to help other children in the community, who were not as fortunate as us. As we grew older, her job did not become any easier.

When I was an adolescent, my mother faced her toughest challenge yet. In the past, I had always wanted to make my mother proud, so it is no coincidence that I obeyed her commands; however, as a teenager, I was destined to rebel--I wanted my way. From drinking underage to sneaking out at night with friends, I always found my mother there upon my return, with a frown on her face. She handled my troublesome times with grace and experience. For her first time raising children or dealing with those issues, she seemed to be an expert. During my early adulthood, she once again began working for a bank, with reasonable hours, trying to become a manager once again. Her "nagging" kept me working, kept me focused, and allowed me to get into every college and university I applied to. Somehow she is able to balance raising two children, a boy and a girl, and a full-time job. I know I would not have made a successful transition into adulthood without her directly and indirectly influencing my life.

My mother's shining moment came when I was accepted to the United States Coast Guard Academy. All the work and time she had invested in me had finally paid off. Moving from a direct supervisor role, my mother began to give me advice for the future, both short-term and long-term. She only hoped some of her training and experience would soak in. Promoted to manager at her bank, my mother had to invest more of her free time into raising my sister and me, and paperwork at work. Somehow she became "employee of the month" at both jobs, at least to me. Even now I find myself thinking "What would Mother do?" She successfully raised me from birth to adulthood, something only some parents can say. I do still make many mistakes, or get confused on what is the right course of action, but I know my mother is one call or email away when the going gets really tough. Being a parent, especially a mother, is not an easy job, especially with older children determined to cause trouble (like me).

Although it is miraculous what mothers do, many do not do it alone. My father, although not my main educator, provided the male advice and supported my mother in all of her decisions 100 percent. Without a father, mothering becomes near impossible, so my father is a hero for being able to work at a stressful and often more than full-time job. Despite what happened at work, he was always able to come home positive and energetic. His attitude helped contribute to a happy and productive living environment.

Looking back, as a child I always told my mother I loved her, but I never really showed it. I became happy when she was proud of me, but I would disobey her the same day to do something I wanted. She, along with all mothers, sacrifice their jobs and their lives for their children. What would we do without our mothers?

Throughout our lives, we change our beliefs, our values, and our goals, and as such, our heroes evolve over time as well. Rarely do we find a hero from whom we evolved; my mother, my main hero, is one such role model. Despite all the boundaries between us, I know I can always come to her for advice, support, or laughter. It took me 18 years to realize the true hero that is my mother.